Mom's Musings from the Dog Show

Editors note: This was printed with permission by the author, Mom O. I have added a few comments throughout in italics... because it's my blog... and I can.

Yesterday I got the following email from my mom on her experience at the dog show last weekend. For those who don't know, my parents' weekend hobby is showing their dogs in agility, obedience, conformation, pretty much any activity that a dog can do!! Read on for more funniness from the dog world by my mom, Sue Oshinski.

I have to tell you about this experience I had at an agility trial this weekend. Here’s a short synopsis of my lovely weekend:
-I potty’d Zipper first thing and noticed a HUGE pile of dog poop with no owner in the general potty area. Since it was very early and there were only about 5 competitors there, I inquired who was so unkind as to leave the mess. A lady holding onto a Great Dane admitted it belonged to her dog but it “stunk too much to pick up” and she would get it in about an hour! There is justice in the world because the show secretary overheard and sent her out to pick it up – it’s a rule and she didn’t care how bad it smelt! (Speaking from experience...I've never found any that has smelled like a bouquet of roses....)
-I put Zipper’s crate in a very quiet room only to come back to find a Belgian Malinois and 2 Scotties charging at his crate and the handler – a young man – finding his dogs’ antics very amusing. He is lucky he left the room with his life! (It is not wise to make my mom mad or mess with her dogs - or family either for that matter).
-I managed to sit my chair down next to a young woman who had to call her husband after every run and give him a play by play. She did this by facing the course and sharing with him obstacle by obstacle every second of her pit bulls brutally ugly (and SLOW) non-qualifying run. Since there were eight courses, there were eight phone calls – at least. (If he was interested....wouldn't he have to come to the show with her??)
-I also managed to sit behind a woman who decided that putting a leash on her Sheltie would be a life altering event – she actually told me “he gets too stressed to wear a leash.” Ahhh, excuse me, but that’s a rule too and it’s a rule to avoid dog fights. A quick end to this story is her dog left the course and ran over to the area I was sitting in and decided she also would like a taste of Zipper’s backside. I had to push her dog away with my foot, because I was using both hands to control Zipper who by this point (after the Malinois and Scotties) had determined “a good offense is a good defense.” Needless to say this woman was sure I was kicking her dog. Again, my friends defended me, told the woman her dog was the problem, and I had every right to defend my dog who happened to be on leash sitting quietly underneath my chair like he has for the last 5 years.

Zipper under chair at dog show.

-I was quickly becoming very unpopular with my co-competitors because #1 I had friends in high places, #2 almost got 2 people kicked out of the show (for very serious show violations) and #3 my dog qualified on 8 out of 8 courses and taking home too much blue. I really enjoy the social aspect of showing dogs and meeting new people. Needless to say, I found shoulders a bit cold.
-Sunday the nice young lady with the cell phone was constantly whining at her husband her dog was tired and was getting worse. This was her set-up: she had a crate for her dog (never used except as a table), a chair for her dog and a chair for herself. Because her dog “liked to watch what was going on” she sat him in the chair all day Saturday and all day Sunday. Anyone who has ever owned a dog can tell you the most comfortable position for a dog is….lying down! I very much wanted to explain to this young lady why her dog was getting progressively worse as the weekend wore on but I was afraid it would result in another phone call to check my theory with her husband.
-Should I also include the gentleman who’s dog has allergies? His set-up looked like a walking vet clinic! He had cooled calamine lotion in a thermos, an Elizabethan collar so his dog wouldn’t chew her feet, two fans big enough to keep me cool 2 rows back, chamomile tea to sooth his dog’s feet after she ran and booties to put on her for trips outdoors. My only thought after 2 days watching this circus was why stress a sick dog? (This is Adrienne's favorite part of the story!!)

For the most past, the people I have met at dog shows have been wonderful and engaging people who just happen to like dogs a lot. This group of people were nuts and don’t make me anxious to spend more time with them – at another trial or at the other show!

THANKS MOM! TOO FUNNY!!